Tickle My Tush: Bootylicious or Banal?

Let us turn our attention now away from Barbara Dunn, god bless her, and toward her gainful employer, one Dr. Sadie Allison, America’s Pleasure Coach.™

Dr. Allison, seen here in a bathtub of dildos, has made a nice career for herself opining about sex. She’s been on TV a bunch of times. Her company, Tickle Kitty, Inc., produces Slippery Kitty™ Lube and has sold over two million pocketsize sex guides authored by Dr. Allison. Her masterwork, “Tickle His Pickle: Your Hands-On Guide to Penis Pleasing,” is a must-read, and was recently added to the modern American literary canon, by me. Barbara Dunn was kind enough to send me Dr. Allison’s latest book, “Tickle My Tush: Mild-to-Wild Analplay Adventures for Everybooty,” for review on The Not Funnies.

Dr. Allison is a sexy babe who clearly knows a lot about boning, so I was ready for a depraved, scat-soaked page-turner that would leave me lusting for more. More butt sex, that is.

Instead, I was appalled to find a touchy-feely self-help book that advocates “lovemaking” and “passionate kissing” (gross!).

No ass to mouth. No back alley fisting. No doodie explosions. The terms “killer rimjobbers” and “anal blasters” never appear once. And it states right on the copy page, “The illustrations in this book depict couples who are in faithful, monogamous relationships.” You know what that means. No truck drivers. No dope fiends.

This is your grandma’s guide to butt sex.

“Tickle My Tush” has done the unthinkable and made an image of a chick blowing a guy while she fingers his asshole look downright romantic.

Squandering opportunities for perversion at every turn, Dr. Allison opts to normalize her material, right down to the term analplay. Her tone is upbeat and informative, and the illustrations by Steve Lee are actually pretty damn good. The key to butt sex, I learned over the course of 130-some-odd pages, is to start slowly and use lots of lube. It’s like she just wants everyone to be comfortable with their bodies and explore their sexuality in safe, healthy ways. Which, of course, is ridiculous. These are buttholes we’re talking about here. They’re shameful.

But if all this sensitive New Age rubbish strikes your fancy, you may have come to the right place. Grab your sweetheart and try a sensual booty massage (chapter 6). Or test out some level 2 fingerplay (chapter 7). Or don a strap-on and make your partner give it head before you screw them in the ass with it (chapter 13). Come to think of it, there’s some pretty sick shit in this book. Touché, Dr. Allison. Touché.

(Two Out of Four Ben Wa Balls)

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Hello Again: Exposition and Analplay

So like three years ago I was unemployed and I started this blog The Not Funnies where I made fun of comic strips. And it was going pretty well for a few weeks and I was enjoying myself. But then the whole thing blew up way too fast and I made a ton of money overnight. I got hooked on the fast life (and blow) and spent all my dough just as fast as I made it (do not buy a monster truck at first it seems really cool but it is a WASTE of money plus I don’t even think it was the real Grave Digger). Humbled and alone, I moved out of the Hotel de Crillon and got a job at Dollar General, vowing never again to blog about the funny pages that so ruined my promising young life.

Then last month I got this email:

Hello again



Barbara's Boss, Dr. Sadie Allison

I sent you an email last week (she did not) and hadn't heard back so I just wanted to try again to see if you'd like to receive a copy of Dr. Sadie's newest book, "Tickle My Tush," to review on The Not Funnies. I’ve put together everything about the book into this microsite:



http://ticklemytushbook.com



Please let me know if you'd like a review copy. When you do review the book, please pop me the link as I'd love to share it with Sadie.

Please let me know if you have any questions.



Thanks so much,


Barbara Dunn

Tickle Kitty

SO. MANY. QUESTIONS.

For starters, why would any competent publicist pitch a book review for “Tickle My Tush: Mild-to-Wild Analplay Adventures for Everybooty” to a long-dormant comic strip blog that was never popular to begin with?

Possibilities: 1) Barbara Dunn is a sophisticated spambot (entirely plausible); 2) Barbara’s software scans the web for blogs that use certain words and phrases, like “cornholing” or “Blondie’s boobs”(likely, even); 3) Barbara is a longtime fan of The Not Funnies who wants to see the blog return while expanding its purview to include butt sex, both mild and wild (No).

(Maybe?)

Yes, I told Barbara, I would love to review the book, and please do be in touch! And today I hold in my hands a copy of Dr. Sadie Allison’s latest sexual opus, which I will review on this blog in the coming days.

Does all this add up to more rants about the Lockhorns, Jim Davis, and something called Drabble? Maybe? Why not. From here on out, I blog for Barbara.

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